There was a time when i tried to express how i felt to the world and people around me, but the problem was that i was trying to be like a super skilled artist like drawing and painting and the results were bad as fuck. I was not feeling good or being a real artist at all because a real artist always express their emotions and feelings through his/hers best way. It can be drawing, it can be photoshop, it can be just taking photos at exact time/frame, ect. It was a time when i was a little young innocent kid with no real sense of what was going on this world or what i was doing with my bear hands. How wonderfull.
At the age 13 (or 14, i don't even know to be honest), i have met a wonderfull game that inspired me to be a game designer and addicted me like a drug. It was Team Fortress 2. I have met lots of people with different mentalities and perspectives of this society. Some were really my best friends, some were just passing by for sort time. Like every game designer, i have multiple interests at gaming but the 2nd game, i got addicted, tried to learn and express my feelings and who i am, is Garry's Mod. Oh Garry's Mod, beautifull game to pass time, troll your friends or just to make hilarious animations and random shit. No one can hate that game in my opinion.
I had an huge friend who showed me the beauty of Garry's Mod art and pose. He was good at posing models in that game and edit screenshots after it was done. He motivated me and tried to teach me how to pose like a profissional artist but, in the end, i was still shit. Because i still didn't learn how to pose and express the emotions, feelings and people's personality. Then bad things happened and he moved on leaving me behind and i had to try to live my life by my own. It was 5 years ago, i don't feel angry, sad or anything negative to that situation but i must admite, it was a right choice for me. In other hand, i wouldn't be an artist without meeting him and Garry's Mod community.
So recently, i have been trying to be positive person and be happy but i was still having depression and it was not good at all. Then i have found out there is a usefull tool for animation and posing, Source Filmmaker. It was made in Source Engine from Valve in order to people, artists and content creators to create their own world and share to others. So what did i do? I gave myself another chance to make art and pose again but in Source Filmmaker.
Until this day, i have been learning and mastering my skills with that good piece of software and also, i have finally put my time to learn how to express people's feelings, emotions and personalities. Right now, i have been using that to feel better, express my thoughts and show to other people my own work. I have got good feedback and motivation from people who i care about and like me. They really enjoy my work.
I think i can call myself an artist now, but this is only the beginning. The beginning of my new age.